A Musical Magpie

A Musical Magpie

By Lynne Dellow

There once lived a magpie in our village

Who liked a challenge but also to pillage.

He sneaked into the vicarage kitchen taking a joint of lamb

Making the housekeeper so angry once she even said damn

He’d steal burgers and bangers on BBQ night.

And was often the cause of quite a few fights.

People blamed each other when things went missing.

Why one man hit his friend with a garden besom!

Magnus’s favourite house was number one

Where everyone seemed to have such fun.

Here he never stole or did anything wrong

But sat on a branch clicking his own special song.

One day digging for worms, Magnus heard an unusual sound.

Such a beautiful voice made him turn around

Coming from a window at number one a young girl was singing

From the opera Carmen- the notes long and ringing.

He flew as close as he dared -in fact up to the french door

Listened in silence ‘till he could stand it no more.

And in magpie tongue yelled ‘Encore! Encore!’.

Georgina stared in amazement at this handsome bird

Was it talking to her? No that was absurd!.

She carried on singing, she could not stop

Her lines she must learn, no way could she flop.

It was audition time at her local op.

Where she’d always been understudy to Matilda von Klopp.

Although a note she could hold and her voice was much sweeter.

Nerves had stopped her before but this time she’d make sure

they’d not beat her.

Audition day came at last for our Georgina

And at first there couldn’t have been anyone keener.

But as the day wore on the dreaded nerves set in

‘Till she found herself heading to the drinks cabinet for a bottle of gin!!

Magnus flew up to the door expecting to hear Georgina sing

But saw a slightly tiddly young lady nervously twisting her ring!

What was wrong with this girl whose voice was so sweet?

Drastic action had to be taken, so he hopped to her feet.

Magnus started clicking Georgina’s Carmen song

Holding certain notes incredibly long.

The sight of a magpie swaying and clacking

Made Georgina laugh and send those vile nerves a packing.

That evening down at the hall to sing she began

Watched by Miss von Klopp and, of course by her greatest fan.

Magnus clicked in time and all were impressed

By this handsome magpie with the puffed out chest.

Georgina won the lead role but with one provision

That Magnus accompanied her- a unanimous decision.

They each sang their hearts out every night

And I heard that after the final performance they both got a little bit tight!

Magnus gives lessons to any aspiring musical bird

Sometimes the racket’s were so bad, the worst ever heard.

But Magnus is patient and awfully kind

For a Pavarotti one day he is hoping to find!

Copyright Lynne Dellow