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Thursday, 1 October 2020

BEACH BUMMER

 

BEACH BUMMER ( A Parody )

By Peter Woodgate

I must go down to the beach again

With the kids and mother-in-law,

The car will be full of clothes made of wool

Not to mention blankets galore.

 

I must go down to the beach again

To the rocks, the pebbles and sea,

Where tin cans rot and there isn’t a spot

To sit with any safety.

 

I must go down to the beach again

To the noise, the crowds and the queues,

It’s anyone’s guess where dogs leave their mess

And the oil slick sticks to my shoes.

 

I must go down to the beach again

Where lifeguards sit all day,

Deck chairs flap and the wind takes my cap

On a journey across the bay.

 

I must go down to the beach again

To candy floss, ice cream and pies,

With sand in my toes, in my mouth and my nose

In my hair, in my ears and my eyes.

 

I must go down to the beach again

For the journey is forced upon me,

Yet all I ask, is a huge hip flask

Of gin, or scotch, but not tea.

 

Copyright Peter Woodgate

 

4 comments:

  1. Very entertaining peter. I think 'I must go down to the sea again' was the original; or was that Spike Milligan? Whatever, you wont catch me down there: Ain't Southend-on-Mud is it...

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    1. Yes Len, John Masefield, I must go down to the sea again.
      I chose this as a parody as, although serving in the navy, he hated the sea and longed to become a poet and artist. he became Poet Laureate.

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  2. Great parody Peter. I can remember snippets of the poem although I can't remember the poet's name (but know he was one of the 'greats'). "I must go down to the sea again, to the lonely sea and the sky, where.............and the wind cuts like a whetted knife." I'll look it up on Google - well worth reading again.

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    Replies
    1. Yes Janet, John Masefield and you remembered some of the words.
      It is ironic that this seemingly love of the sea was false and as explained to Len, he hated the sea. Another poem he wrote, with connections to the sea was Cargoes. This poem clearly shows his contempt for the British outlook on the art world against that of other countries throughout the globe.

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