A Hand of Whist

A Hand of Whist

 

By Len Morgan

For an hour Forbes stood impassively behind his master at the Carlton Gentlemen's Club, as Sir Geoffrey played his cards, badly, and got punished for it.   One man was winning consistently.   He knew when to play a hand and when to fold.  He wasn't greedy and was happy to win small hands and cause no real embarrassment.  He made the game enjoyable for the other players, offering congratulations on good play and advice between hands, without seeming to preach.   In contrast to Sir Geoffrey, who was a bad player and a notoriously bad loser.   He lost hand after hand regardless of who partnered him.  He'd lost close to a 100 guineas when he left the table in a huff; Forbes followed, a step behind his master, as dictated by form.

"Unmitigated cheek Forbes.   Damned Galsworthy cheated me out of 200 guineas!"

" I saw no evidence of cheating Sir Geoffrey, the fellows an uncommonly good player, and I counted but 100 guineas leave your purse, sir,"

"Are you calling me a liar Forbes?"

"No sir, Au contraire, I'm simply suggesting that in the heat of the moment it's easy to miscount.  In a sense, you could say I've halved your losses at a stroke sir."

"I'm not in the mood for jokes Forbes.  Do you play whist?"

"I do sir," he said as he assisted his master into the coach, taking the seat opposite as propriety dictates.

"What kind of player are you?"

"Actually, I'm quite proficient sir."

"And, you think I play badly?"

"I wouldn't say that sir."

"Aha!  Now you're being diplomatic..."

"Well sir, I would say there is room for improvement."

"Room for improvement?  Impudent scally, you think you could beat me?"

"No sir!  I wouldn't be happy about taking your money.  But, I could play along and point out other possible stratagems."

"Heh, heh, you're going to teach me how to play eh?"

"It is within the remit of a manservant to maximise his masters potential."

"Well, we would need two other players."

"I would suggest Mr Jarvis your butler, and Smythe, your stable master, sir. 

Both are excellent players.  We could play for farthings to save embarrassment."

"Farthings?  Farthings?  I couldn't possibly play for such low stakes." 

"They are house stakes sir, but if we play with chips you could call them guineas.  Remember the object is to improve your play not to take your money, sir."

.-...-.

So, That evening, in the saddle room of Harley Manor, they played their first hand of whist.  After the first hand had been won, by Jarvis & Smythe, they laid out their cards and talked through the plays.  At the conclusion, the result was unchanged.  But, over the next three hands, to Sir Geoffrey's surprise, the analysis reversed the results.

At the evenings conclusion, Sir Geoffrey paid out 20 guineas to his surprised Butler & Groom and Forbes paid out 20 farthings (5 pennies).

"Same again tomorrow evening," said Sir Geoffrey."  By the end of the month, Sir Geoffrey was winning as many hands as he lost.

.-...-.

They returned to his club after five weeks absence, to the great relief of Galsworthy and other players anticipating a pecuniary improvement.  But, by the end of the evening, their disappointment was evident, when Sir Geoffrey left the table with 120 guineas of their money. 

"Extraordinary lucky," said major Griffin.

Galsworthy smiled. "He's taking lessons."

"I say, dashed unsporting what?" said colonel Fisher.

"No, no, we'll get it all back with interest tomorrow eh colonel?" said the major.

"Hehem..." the colonel replied

"Well, it certainly made the game more interesting.  If you like I'll pair with him when next we meet," said Galsworthy.

As matters transpired it would be a week before they next saw Sir Geoffrey.  Forbes was confident that they were well prepared and so it proved.  Galsworthy and Sir Geoffrey took 300 guineas away from the table that evening.

"Well sir, you are now officially an excellent player.  So, I doubt you will be joining our games in the tack room in future," Forbes sounded genuinely regretful as he assisted Sir Geoffrey into his coach.

"Not a bit of it Forbes, the players at the Carlton Club come a poor second to the members of the Harley Manor club, like taking candy canes from babies!  Tell Jarvis & Smythe I intend winning all my money back; every brass farthing!" 

"Gloves off sir?"  Forbes broke into an uncharacteristic smile, rubbing his hands as he took his seat.  The wily servants had been sharing the guineas three ways; now they would step it up a gear. 

Copyright Len Morgan