Followers

Thursday, 20 June 2024

THE HIGH LIFE [Part 4]

 THE HIGH LIFE    [Part 4]

By Richard Banks        


         The front door opens and shuts and Neville enters the hall and continues up the stairs, followed twenty minutes later by Mildred who’s looking less than pleased to be back. She too ascends the stairs and for a moment the sound of their voices can be heard as she enters their bedroom.

         It’s only half an hour until dinner so I await their arrival in the dining room where the servants are preparing the long table that this evening has only two place settings, one at both ends.  When I was around, Mildred sat in the middle which was very useful for passing the condiments. Today they both have a set each, plus a bottle of claret for Neville. As there’s no glass at Mildred’s end she is evidently on the wagon in the runup to the big day. They arrive in full evening dress and take their seats without exchanging a word. They are definitely not getting on. Could their consciences be troubling them? I do hope so; it's unusual for marital bliss to be fading this soon.

         For now the chances of them saying anything about me while the servants are in the room is next to nil. Their conversation, about the places they have gone and people met, is stilted, an unconvincing attempt to give the impression that all is well; it would be bad form to do otherwise in front of the servants. Coffee is served along with a bottle of brandy for Neville. The servants withdraw. Left to themselves they are even less talkative than before. Neville stares down the table at Mildred and enquires after the baby. On receiving the reply that, “it’s OK, why shouldn’t it be OK,” his face bristles with annoyance.

         “Haven’t been overdoing it, have you?” he asks in a tone of voice that suggests he would rather Mildred had stayed at home.

         “Don’t worry about me,” snaps Mildred, “but then you never do. All you care about is yourself and the baby, and if that turns out to be a girl she’ll get the Gatehouse treatment like the rest of them. And how’s your other sprog, the one you’ve started with that whore at the kennel club. When is that due, five, six months? Well don’t think you’re going to get rid of me as easy as you did   Maddie. I’ll see you in prison before that happens!”  

         Neville looks anxiously towards the door. “What’s the matter with you? Do you want to spend the rest of your life in Holloway, because that’s where you’ll be going if you carry on like this.” He abandons his seat for one further down the table, and speaks in a quieter voice. “No one must know about that, it’s our secret, and as long as it stays that way, and you do what you’re told, the worse thing coming your way will be divorce and a decent settlement. That’s what I offered your sister. If that ever happens I trust you’ll be more sensible than she was.”

         Mildred looks scared out of her wits and I’m almost sorry for her. She signifies her compliance with a terse nod of her head and announces she’s off to bed. She lingers only long enough to say that if Neville intends finishing the bottle she would rather he slept in one of the other bedrooms. Neville replies that it’s all the same to him and watches her leave the room. He returns to his end of the table and pours himself another brandy.

         “Fool!” I say without meaning to, and his head and shoulders shake like they’ve just had an electric shock.

         “No!” he stutters, “it was nothing, you heard nothing. Get a grip, you’re getting as bad as Mildred.” He downs his drink and takes a deep breath before refilling his glass. He’s already the worse for wear. By the time he finishes the bottle, as no doubt he will, he may be too drunk to get up the stairs. Perhaps the same thought has found its way into his addled brain for after a few minutes he snatches up the bottle and staggers out into the hall where he stands at the foot of the Grand Stairway like a mountaineer about to undertake a perilous ascent. With one hand clutching the brandy and the other tight on the bannister he reaches base camp on the first floor landing, but, instead of turning into one of the bedrooms, he continues along the corridor to his study. I follow him in.

         I have always wondered what he did in his study. Not studying, that’s for sure, unless it’s the Racing News; as for estate business, that’s handled by the office staff in one of the cottages. So, now the great mystery is to be revealed. But mysteries, once known are usually disappointing and the sight of girly magazines on his desk are no more than I expected. However, he hardly glances at them, so that’s not why he’s here. Behind his desk is a sideboard on which he leans before reaching up to the painting above it depicting a number of under clad nymphs cavorting by a waterfall. A first I think he’s trying to grope the one left of centre, but then he steadies himself, takes a firm grip on the frame and swings it and the picture away from the wall to reveal a safe. It has a dial which he twiddles back and forth, and, after a good deal of cursing, the safe is opened. It’s full of money, fifty pound notes, and a metal box which he takes back to his desk. Inside there’s more diamonds than days in a month. These are good quality diamonds and I should know; being a former Lady Frampton I’ve seen plenty, both around my neck and those of other titled Ladies.

         So why are they here instead of in the office safe where my own jewels are kept? Could they be connected to Neville’s trips to South Africa? His explanation that he visits an old school friend was never very convincing, especially when friend Kevin sometimes became a Keith after a drink too many. He’s definitely up to something and, as Neville thinks that the normal rules of life don’t apply to him that ‘something’ is likely to be on the wrong side of the law. He separates out five stones and places them in a small, linen bag that he puts in the briefcase he takes to London.

         All this is giving me food for thought. I have the glimmer of a plan but if Neville’s off to London tomorrow he’ll be missing until Sunday evening. But no matter, that still leaves me two days to do what I must. He will get everything he deserves but Mildred, I’m not so sure. The bitch is as guilty as Neville, but she is my sister, my flesh and blood, and what’s more she’s expecting a baby who’s never done me any harm. Suddenly, a few days thinking time and two for ‘the doing’ seem about right.

           Neville returns the rest of the diamonds to the safe which he closes and locks by scrambling the dial. He puts back the picture while leering drunkenly at the nymphs. Then he’s off, along the corridor and into one of the guest rooms.

         I leave him to it and visit my darling girls in the Gatehouse. They’re asleep of course and I watch their shallow breathing until I too fall asleep. Being a spirit, especially one on a mission, is a tiring business and by the time I’m awake they’re up and being readied for school. I watch them go and want to follow but can’t; there’s an invisible barrier I can’t breach. I have the run of Frampton and its grounds but not one step beyond.

         So its back to the house where Neville and Mildred are having breakfast during which he announces that he’s off to London and will be staying at his club. Mildred asks if he will be taking his whore with him and Neville says don’t be ridiculous and that he will be back on Sunday. Mildred says she can’t wait, and on gulping back her coffee hurries out of the room. She’s scared, no doubt about that, but also jealous, and if she’s not feeling guilty about what happened to me she darn well should be! As she passes my picture on the stairs she shudders and almost stops before hurrying up the last few steps that right-turn into the first floor corridor. She’s in tears. Too late for that, I’m thinking. She must be punished, she deserves to be punished, indeed her punishment seems to have already begun. But I won’t feel sorry for her, it’s not just my life she has blighted.

        

[To be Continued]

 

Copyright Richard Banks

Monday, 17 June 2024

Just Another Ordinary Day

 Just Another Ordinary Day    

By Jane Scoggins                                       


The sink was full of dirty dishes, the breakfast egg congealed on the

plates. A pool of milk sat in a perfect round convex, shimmering on the kitchen worktop. It was just waiting for the slightest jolt to burst out and spill down the cabinet to the floor.

Cornflakes crunched underfoot. The Hoover, upright and silent in the hallway stood to attention like a guardsman in his shiny red jacket, waiting for the order to ‘jump to and clean up’. The dog, having finished snuffling around for tit bits on the kitchen floor now waited by the back door assuming a pathetic look that combined an attitude of urgency for the purpose of expressing his outdoor toileting needs. Jackie surveyed the kitchen wreckage and sighed, muttering to herself, ‘‘Just another ordinary day I see, welcome to the usual morning bomb site Jackie’’

The dog, with his sensitive hearing hoped that the words, despite being delivered in a low tone by his loving mistress were for him and an indication that a walk was imminent. Bingo understood the word walk, but also knew that other words that did not sound like walk may possibly lead to a walk if spoken in his direction. It was only when words directed to him with a shake of the head, indicated that there was no chance of a walk in the near future. On these occasions Bingo knew it was best to retreat to his bed and lie quietly but expectantly for a while, until summoned by Jackie, big Dave, smaller Tim or even smaller Katie. A lot of the day was spent with Jackie in the house and. Bingo had become accustomed to her routine once Dave, Tim and Katie had jumped up from the kitchen table, scraped back their chairs, grabbed their coats and hurried out the front door. Bingo had never quite got used to this sudden flurry of early morning activity, and the  four individually pitched voices all speaking very fast at the same time. But he always felt unexpectedly excited every morning when this happened and was compelled to join in with the rushing about and the noisy voices competition. His involvement was curtailed when told to stop barking and running around in circles in the overcrowded kitchen. Sometimes he was told to go to his basket and calm down. Bingo appreciated this order as he never had any idea what he was getting excited about and didn’t know when to stop. Bingo and Jackie were good friends and therefore had lots of communication throughout the day. Jackie had a routine so Bingo generally knew the pattern that the morning would take, thus allowing him to avoid the bits he did not enjoy like the vacuum cleaning machine that scared him. Sometimes Jackie sang, sometimes she put on the radio, and sometimes she did both. Quite often she would talk to Bingo as she went about her jobs putting the house to rights. First it was the downstairs rooms and then upstairs to the bedrooms. Bingo listened out for the change in tone in Jackie’s voice. When she was cross about something she had to clear up in Tim and Katie’s rooms he would slink away under a bed in another bedroom where he could keep safe company with a pair of soft fluffy slippers or bigger rough tweedy ones. He loved washing clothes days as he enjoyed snuffling through the delicious smells hidden in the piles of dirty laundry waiting on the landing, or on the kitchen floor ready to go into the washing machine. Socks and jeans were particular favourites. He liked to help find abandoned clothing under the beds and bring them out. Sometimes Jackie showed appreciation and sometimes not. She was definitely not impressed when he tipped over the piles of clean laundry and spread it around the floor whilst he went in search of an interesting scent or chewed on a button. He particularly liked running around the house with a sock or T shirt in his mouth waiting for Jackie to chase him. Sometimes she whacked him with the newspaper and although it did not hurt he knew that it was temporarily time to stop what ever he was doing, however much fun.  A very good game involved skidding across the kitchen floor after Jackie had taken time with her mop to create what he believed to be a lovely wet play area. Bingo had better hearing than Jackie and liked to be helpful by barking loudly and running around her feet when he heard the doorbell or the telephone ring. Sometimes he would chase his tail around and around in a circle to get her attention as an alternative or in addition to barking.

When Jackie finished her jobs she would take Bingo out for a walk. This is what  he had been waiting for. When she reached for her coat and his lead, Bingo could not help but run up and down the stairs a few times as fast as he could to show he was aware of the plan, ready and excited. Sometimes, if there were things left on the stairs, they would roll or tumble onto the hall floor or get tangled up in his paws.

When Tim and Katie came back in the afternoon there would be more activity. He couldn’t wait to perform tricks for them. He took requests for tricks as seriously as any good performer, and was generally very pleased with himself for the response he received. He could roll over, jump over the footstool, and when in the mood and given encouragement would sing. A particular favourite of his was ‘How Much Is that Doggy in the Window.’ As soon as he heard this music Bingo was ready to give his best rendering. The postman was a welcome visitor to the front door. Bingo could hear him coming up the path and could smell him faintly when he put things through the draughty letterbox. Sometimes it was the whiff of another dog, sometimes a bit pepperminty, but not as strong as the Polo mint he had found and crunched, under big Dave’s chair. Bingo had only seen him properly through the window but had barked hello very loudly many times and the postman usually waved at him in a friendly way. He sniffed the envelopes that come through the letterbox and would lick some of them, or pick them up in his mouth and shake them about a bit if they were large enough. The mistress often had to push him aside to pick them up before they got bent or a bit damp. Sometimes she put them down again, especially if they were the brown colour. But if she liked the look of them she opened them straight away. Bingo knew that this was usually a cue for her to take a break and have a drink and a biscuit. Bingo was happy when this happened as there may be crumbs or even broken pieces of biscuit for him to eat. He was more than willing to attract Jackie's attention by performing a trick or sit in front of her and paw her leg gently, for the pleasure of being rewarded a treat.

On this particular ordinary day, Jackie, having finished the chores, and with the dishes washed, the laundry sorted and in the machine she was ready for a sit down with a cup of coffee. Bingo had been under her feet all morning running around with a sock in

his mouth and refusing to let her put it in the washing machine Added to this he had been making paw prints on the clean kitchen floor. However she loved him a lot, and his funny antics make her laugh and kept her sane whilst she tackled the boring humdrum daily housework. Picking up the one letter from the mat that had arrived that day she slit it open whilst waiting for the kettle to boil. Having quickly scanned the words she read out loud to Bingo.

‘‘Bingo, the magazine likes my stories about you; they want me to do a weekly column, a sort of Dog’s Blog. They say that hearing about your antics made them laugh. They are sure that their readers would like to hear about the things you get up to. Do you remember when you ran around the house with a pair of Tim’s underpants on your head, with your ears poking out? We couldn’t catch you, and then you escaped out the house and ran down the street. Tim ran after you and was so embarrassed because he saw a girl he knew and she saw you had a pair of his Spiderman underpants on his head. She laughed and laughed, but all he could do was go bright red knowing it would all be around the school next day. Well, the editor loved that story and wants more. Thank you Bingo. This hasn’t turned out to be just another ordinary day after all!’’

                                                                        Copyright Jane Scoggins

Friday, 14 June 2024

The High life [Part 3]

 The High life [Part 3]

By Richard Banks 


I take myself down to the kitchen where Cook and the rest of the kitchen staff are washing dishes and preparing lunch which, if not taken, will be eaten by themselves. Life below stairs is seldom a hungry one. It’s also never short of gossip so I sit myself down on a shelf next to the cocoa jar and listen to every word that’s said, most of which is about their current employers. It seems that they are a less than a loving couple and that their initial attraction has quickly cooled. If Mildred’s bump doesn’t produce a male heir their expectation is that it won’t be long before he jumps ship and finds himself a third Lady Frampton. Indeed they have opened a book on when this will be. And, just when I’m despairing of them saying anything about the girls, in comes Trudy with the news I’ve been seeking.

         Neville has had them, and herself, moved to the Gatehouse on the edge of the estate where the sound of their voices is unlikely to aggravate his ever more frequent hangovers. Being the ‘ever loving’ father he visits them twice a week, and complains about how much they are costing him. Cassie attends the village school where she will be joined soon by Catherine. Only when the five of them are old enough to be married are they likely to be of any interest to their father who each morning examines the births’ column in The Times for eligible sons-in-law. As for Mildred she’s not been herself since I died of that heart attack. If the baby she’s expecting was on its way before my demise they’re thinking she might very well be suffering from a guilty conscience. Even if things did happen in the right order their marriage was very definitely too much too soon.

         Nurse says that it’s the children she feels sorry for. Losing their mother is bad enough but having a father who can’t abide them and is seldom sober past dinner time is a blight on their lives, as it must be for her Ladyship. They fall silent for a few seconds, no doubt reflecting on the good times when I was around, but when they get back to talking it’s about Ernest, ‘the young master’ Neville’s brother who’s the President of various good causes, including the Auxiliary Ambulance and the Lame Dogs League. Goody Two Shoes, Neville called him, and I must admit I thought so too but now I’m beginning to see that he may have his uses, for Ernest is the children’s guardian should both their parents predecease them. And Ernest has a wife, another paragon of virtue, who loves children and has none of her own.

         All this is beginning to fit together so well that I’m beginning to think that the Good Lord already knows how he wants all this to end, if only something terminal and unethical was to befall the two villains impeding his good intent. Is that why I’m still here when the Angel should have been saving me from myself? If so, how devious is that?

         Nurse departs with the vegetables she’s come to collect and the conversation turns to the mundane business of the day, so I’m off. I’m still short of a plan but as what I do depends on what I’m able to do I decide that a day spent in discovering and practising my new powers is unlikely to be time wasted.

         Navigation is the least of my problems and I can go up and down and side to side better than than the helicopters that pass overhead most days. My aura can be easily turned on and off and has all the colours of the rainbow and those in between. I can make it faint or bright, flicker it on and off like lights on a Christmas tree, or rearrange my head so that it fits under either arm. As for my face I can change that too and I have great fun practising different expressions in front of the mirror in the Great Hall. It’s my angry, demonic face I’m most pleased with, especially when I ruffle up my hair into a dishevelled Afro. My voice is almost back to normal but my ability to impact on or manipulate physical objects has gone never more to return. A shame that, as knowing where to find Neville’s shotgun I would gladly give him and Mildred both barrels. However, hot thoughts are not without their consequences for my aura which erupts into flames. Indeed it seems I have set the Great Hall ablaze, but once I calm down everything goes back to how it was.  Thank goodness for that! Whatever plan I come up with it won’t involve burning down Frampton. That belongs to the girls and they will get every last piece of it.

 

(To Be Continued)

 

Copyright Richard Banks

Wednesday, 12 June 2024

Ghosts

 Ghosts

By Jane Goodhew

She had never been on a long weekend break before or rather not on her own, this was the first and she hoped one of many as it was time to venture out into the world and stop behaving like a precious child who could not manage without its nanny. The hotel looked imposing it was a country house not one of those modern buildings with no personality, this looked as if it could tell many exciting stories of love and intrigue even a murder or two. She was becoming fanciful now with her mind working into overtime instead of just chilling as they say these days. She was supposed to go into neutral and just relax and enjoy the surroundings, the leisurely walks down to the lake and then across to the woodland beyond. She could see what looked like a deep blue velvety carpet interspersed with a mixture of tree mainly old as this was ancient woodland and she remembered that in the brochure she had seen a painting of the bluebells growing in their natural habitat long before the house was built. Bluebells like her loved to be somewhere stable and can be dated back to at least the 1600’s just as her ancestors did. She decided to stop dreaming and go to her room and unpack after asking if they could prepare a picnic lunch so that she could go for a wander without having to rush back to eat in the restaurant as she could do that in the evening at her leisure.

 


                                                        

The receptionist was most obliging and after finding out what sort of sandwhich and drink she would like told her it would be ready for her when she came back down again and called for a bellboy to take her case to her room.  The room was on the third floor, it had a large bay window which looked out over the front lawn, in the distance she could see where she intended to take her walk and the path that led down to the woods.  The bedroom was larger than she had imagined and had a writing desk infront of the side window which had a view across to the stables.  She thought that maybe tomorrow she would go for a ride; she had had lessons as a child and decided it must be like riding a bike once learnt not forgotten?  She changed into more comfortable clothing and then went down the large staircase to the reception resisting the urge to slide down the highly polished bannister. 

There must have been a change of shift as it was not the kindly lady who had organised her picnic but a middle aged man who looked as if he had had enough of life and resented being there.  He eventually looked up at her and grumpily asked what she wanted, she explained she had ordered a lunch and had come to collect it so she could go for a walk in the woods without having to rush back.  Why she was telling him all of this she did not know but she wanted to talk and to try and engaged him into a conversation hoping she could extract a smile from his forlorn face.  Ever since she was a child she had disliked seeing people unhappy and therefore felt it her duty to cheer them up if possible as she had been blessed with a sunny disposition and saw life through rose tinted glasses even though it had not been that way in reality.

 

He rang down to the kitchen and in less than a minute a small wicker picnic basket was presented to her.  She thanked them both, the receptionist and the young girl who had bought it up to her who had turned and left without a word to either of them.  She handed over the key and made her way to the entrance and out into the late Spring sun.  The hyacinth scent wafted up the stone steps and it reminded her of  her aunt Maud’s cottage and the long Easter holidays that she had endured there keeping her obnoxious cousin company.  How grateful she was to be free of them all and to be able to come and go as she pleased, to answer to no-one.   She crossed over the small bridge and into the woodland; it was much cooler there in the shade of the trees which were just beginning to get their foliage back. 

She heard a rustle in the distance and saw a dark figure running through the trees, he must have known his way because in an instance he was gone and there was silence once more.  As if to keep her company the birds began to sing to one another and the bee buzzed  around her head as she bent down to smell the bluebells.  After walking for about half an hour, she decided to stop and have her lunch.  Chicken and advocado sandwich, with a variety of cheese and grapes, apples and  small bottle of wine, what more could she ask for, a few chocolates appeared at the bottom of the basket as if in answer.  Yes, she was content and happily ate the contents thinking about how she would spend the rest of the day before going back to dress for dinner.

The warm environment mixed with the wine must have made her sleepy because the next time she opened her eyes it was dark and she wondered how she would find her way back as there were no lights to be seen.  Her eyes gradually adjusted to the darkness and she saw in the distance what must have been headlights so she headed in that direction hoping that if she got to the road she could go that way back to the hotel.  Eventually she saw the exit and luckily as she did a car drove past and asked if she wanted a lift as coincidently he was staying at the same hotel as her.  She readily accepted and they talked like long lost friends until they got back and then he suggested that as he was on his own perhaps she care to join him for dinner.  How could she refuse, so saying Aurvoir they got their respective keys and went to their rooms to freshen up and dress in more appropriate attire.  She filled the bath to the top and the bubbles ran over but she didn’t care she was happy and after she had dried herself before slipping into her long white gown, she sprayed herself with her new perfume Ghost by Ghost after all that is what they all were.

 

 

  

Copyright Jane Goodhew                                                           

 

 

Wednesday, 5 June 2024

THE HIGH LIFE [Part 2]

 THE HIGH LIFE    [Part 2[

By Richard Banks


So what happens now, I wonder, as the new clock strikes seven. Neville and Mildred won’t be up for at least an hour and when they are they’re unlikely to be saying anything about me. I really need to know what happened, but as I’m invisible and have no voice I can only wait until they talk about it between themselves.

         “And that could take some time,” says a voice, that although expressing my own gloomy thoughts is not my own. There’s a quivering in the air and a bubble arrives that bursts open to reveal my Guardian Angel. At least that’s who he says he is, and having no previous experience of Guardian Angels I can only take him at his word. However, he seems an amiable old chap who evidently only wants to help, and the first thing he does is to turn on my aura.

         “I thought it would be useful if we discussed your options,” he says. “For a start, are you wanting to go straight up, or is it your intention to linger awhile?”

         “Like in loitering?” I say in a frequency he has no difficulty in hearing but is scarcely audible to myself. “Isn’t that a crime?”

         “I mean, do you have any unfinished business you wish to attend to?”

         “Well, I was quite enjoying being Lady Frampton. Couldn’t I carry on with that?”

         The Angel gives a sad shake of his head. “I’m afraid not. It’s been over six earth months since your passing – that’s not the same as celestial time, of course, but you’ll soon get use to that. No, now you’re a spirit there can be no going back to how things were, but if there are any outstanding matters you wish to resolve, like righting a wrong or effecting a reconciliation you may remain here for a period no longer than an Earth week of seven days. During that time you will be expected to remain both silent and invisible revealing your spectral image only when necessary to achieve your purpose. Any good you do will, of course, be noted Up High but should you choose to become a malignant spirit exacting vengeance for past wrongs, that is, I must warn you, a most serious violation of the Celestial Code.”

          “Vengeance,” I say, “what do I have to be vengeful about?” He looks towards the sherry decanter and, when he raises his eyebrows in a way that suggests he knows something I should have worked out for myself, I tumble to the fact that my demise has everything to do with that final sherry, poured and handed to me by my wedded husband in the presence of my unusually silent sister. 

         “Yes, indeed so,” says the Angel who evidently feels that the least said the better. “So, what kind of a spirit are you going to be? Remember, forgiveness is a virtue that will benefit you greatly in the Big Upstairs.”

         “But what about Cassie? She’s Neville’s heir, the next in line to inherit Frampton; if he and Mildred have a boy what will there be for her and the rest of the girls?”

         The Angel’s expression indicates that this is indeed a concern but not one he is able or willing to resolve. “Perhaps,” he says, “it’s best to accept things as they are. After all the child your sister is expecting may be another girl.”

         “Mildred’s expecting!”

         “Yes. Well, you have been away six months.”

         “So, it’s definitely a girl? I say, thinking he knows more than he’s letting on, but he won’t be drawn. Even supposing he did know, he says he’s not allowed to say. Well that’s a fat lot of good I’m thinking, and, judging by the look on his face, he’s only too aware that I’m less than pleased. If he thinks I won’t be asking for extra time so I can do everything possible to help my girls he’s got another think coming. But then he probably knows that too, and that the rules I play by are mostly my own. But before this becomes too obvious I flood my head with thoughts about influencing Neville and Mildred in a nice, friendly way that will appeal to their better natures. I’m not sure the Angel buys this, but after giving me another warning about what I mustn’t do he wishes me well in a begrudging sort of way and disappears as abruptly as he came.

         So, what do I do now? What am I capable of doing? At least I have a spectral image and, after a bit of practice I find I can switch it on and off at will. I also have something resembling a voice. I want to ramp up the volume and scare the pants off the two of them but even if I could, how is that going to help my girls? I need a plan and until I have one it’s best I stay silent and out of sight.

         The sound of voices at the top of the stairs grows louder as Neville and Mildred descend the stairs before passing through the hall into the morning room where breakfast has been set out in the usual dishes. I turn myself off and follow them in. Mildred is indeed expectant, the size of her bump indicating that it was already a work in progress at the time of my passing. As if murder wasn’t enough!!  It’s ‘get even time’; the gloves are off!

         Neville and Mildred forgo the cereals on offer and remove the lids on the dishes containing hot food. Five columns of steam spiral up towards the ceiling along with a sixth that seems to be rising from my own fevered thoughts. This they are oblivious to as they fill their plates and discuss their plans for the day. He’s got a meeting with the Estate Manager while she thinks she will go into town to do some shopping. They look ill at ease. After a night together they seem more than ready to be going their separate ways.

          But where are my girls? What’s happened to them? I should be hearing their voices as Trudy, their nurse, gets them up and dressed, but apart from the steady tick of the carriage clock the house is silent as Neville reads The Times and Mildred stares languidly out of the window.

         Half an hour later they are both away and I whizz about the house looking for the girls only to find no trace of them, their beds not slept in, their cupboards empty. But Cassie’s only seven, I’m thinking, and the others little more than babes in arms. Where are they? And straight away I’m thinking of wicked stepmothers, babes in the woods and all the other fairytale stuff. 

        

        To Be Continued/...

Copyright Richard Banks

Monday, 3 June 2024

THE HIGH LIFE [Part 1]

THE HIGH LIFE   [Part 1] 

By Richard Banks


It was not until after my passing that I discovered the truth. One moment I was in the Waterloo Room, sitting on the sofa and sipping a restorative sherry, the next I wasn’t. It really was that quick. I remember the glass slipping from my fingers but even before it hit the floor I was rising through the ceiling which, despite its solid construction, could do nothing to keep me in.

         But this was the new me, the inside of my head me; my body, my flesh and blood for over thirty years, had been left sideways down on the settee. It was a strange experience but not entirely unpleasant and, on a cloudless evening with the sun sinking towards the horizon, the view of Frampton Hall from up high was a joy to behold. The trouble was that having risen to a point where most days you would expect there to be clouds I continued, ever faster, into space, the Earth below me soon resembling the globe in my children’s playroom. 

         It was all very fascinating but at the same time more than a little alarming and, as I sped further and further away from Earth, I must confess I was thrown into something of a tizz, especially as I was headed straight for the Moon which like me was unable to change direction. A month after Neil Armstrong and Buzz had set down there it seemed I was to be the first woman, but not, I feared, with the same happy outcome. They had buttons to press that made Apollo 11 go up, down and every other way but I had nothing, not even a finger to do the pressing. Worse still I couldn’t slow down, and though common sense told me that having already died I was unlikely to do so again, the prospect of crashing into the lunar surface triggered something in my altered being that I can only describe as instinct or mind over matter, except that my matter had been very much left behind in the Wellington Room.

         “Stop,” I shrieked, or tried to, not a sound passing my non-existent lips. But stop I did. So that’s how it works, I thought. It was just like talking to Fred, our chauffeur, except that I was Fred and by the power of thought able to send me, or what was left of me, anywhere I wanted to go. So back to earth I went and after getting a little muddled with my geography descended back into Frampton Hall as the sun was rising at the start of a new day. Needless to say I assumed this to be the day after my departure, but as I came in through the roof it soon became apparent that this was not the case.

         Whilst I had no wish to see my mortal remains stiff and horizontal on the settee I was both surprised and perplexed to find that their removal was only one of a number of things to have happened since my departure. Indeed, the room had been treated to a complete make over and the Goya above the mantelpiece replaced by some other old master. In the hall the chiming of a new timepiece alerted me to a further change; the old carriage clock that had struck the hour and half hour, with loud reverberating chimes that could be heard in every room of the house, had now been replaced by one, rather smaller, that spoke with a softer voice. Reassuringly the rogues’ gallery of Neville’s ancestors was still there, beginning, at the foot of the Grand Stairway, with the one that came over with William I and continuing up to me and Neville at the top. Yes, there they all were, the same old faces I had passed by, back and forth, so many times, except that now there was one further picture on the first floor landing.           

         This was as puzzling as it was disconcerting, and on rising up to see what it was I came face to face with Neville and his new wife, the sixteenth Lady Frampton, otherwise known as Mildred, my little sister. Resisting the urge to continue on to our bedroom which, perish the thought, must now be their bedroom, I retreated to the Wellington Room where I hoped a little thinking time might make things clearer. Never had I been in more need of a stiff drink and, although my drinking days were now well and truly over, the smell of alcohol around the decanters not only steadied my nerves but put me on the maudlin side of squiffy. Back in the familiar surroundings of Frampton Hall, my present predicament, troubling as it was, seemed less important to me than the loss of a privileged lifestyle that had somehow slipped from my grasp.     

 

         It’s been ten years since I met Neville in a West End club and, on finding him to be the elder son of an Earl, did everything I could to retain his very evident affection. His parents, of course, did everything they could to break us up. After all they were peers of the realm and I was a commoner, and an insignificant one at that. Had my father been a billionaire that might have been enough to buy me into the aristocratic fold, but having neither money nor blue blood I had nothing they were looking for in a daughter-in-law. Fortunately Neville was a headstrong, determined young man who had been spoilt rotten and expected to get whatever he wanted, and what he wanted just then was me.

         It was true love, he said, he had discovered his muse, his soul mate, his rock in this life and the next. He was smitten alright, although his infatuation may have had more to do with my more visible qualities that had recently won me the title of Miss South East Counties, 1958. Having been shown the broom cupboard in which he thought he had been conceived, and declined his invitation to re-enact history, I set-out an alternative scenario that involved a gold ring and a comfortable bed. A week later we were in Gretna Green, and legally wed.

         At first all went well, Neville’s parents were reasonably civil, and he did everything he could to help me fulfil my dynastic mission which was to provide an heir and a spare. It therefore came as no surprise when after only a year of married life I gave birth to our first child, Cassandra.  A wonderful child was Cassandra, healthy and fair of face, who had only one failing – she was not a boy. Neville’s disappointment was only too evident; indeed he did little to conceal it. The Earldom had always passed down through the male line and this was a tradition he was determined to maintain.

         “But you will,” I assured him, “I have two brothers and five uncles, it’s in the genes, we’re bound to have boys.” And so it was that eighteen months later we had Catherine.

         Having failed to convince Neville that she or her sister might very well prove useful in marrying a Prince we returned to ‘mission boy’ with a renewed vigour that soon resulted in the double blessing of the twins – Isabel and Elizabeth. It was at this point that Neville began to take consolation in malt whisky and the solitude of his study. To make matters worse, if worse they could be, my young sister, Mildred lost her husband in a supermarket car park in the sense that he stepped out in front of a delivery van and was a tad too slow in stepping back.

         At least it took my mind off my own troubles and living in a stately home with twenty-four bedrooms I had no hesitation in inviting Mildred to come and stay for a while. A stay that lasted somewhat longer than expected, when it transpired that her husband’s life was uninsured and she had nothing in the kitty to pay their mortgage. Not that she outstayed her welcome. With Neville in a permanent sulk I was more than grateful to have her near by, her presence unnoticed by him and his parents who took her to be a maid or some other minion. It was not until we went riding one day that Neville realised that she was ‘one of us,’ at least by association. Happily they hit it off rather well and she was formally invited to stay as long as she wished which, as far as she was concerned, was as long as possible. After all a life of luxury in a stately home was a distinct improvement on the social housing on offer from Camden Council.

         And so our lives took a turn for the better. Neville emerged from the shadows and we resumed ‘mission boy’ while Mildred was always at hand to look after the girls at inconvenient moments and keep me company when Neville was at his London club having what he called his ‘man time’. Quite what this involved I thought best not to ask, and as he was always very nice to me on his return, his times away were not to be discouraged. Anyway, I had my sister now and whenever we were left to ourselves we filled in the time very pleasantly. And then, just when life couldn’t get better, it did; I became pregnant for a fifth time and Neville’s father died of something the doctor was persuaded not to write on the death certificate. Of course no one should be celebrating the death of their father-in-law but he was a dreadful old bore and with him out of the way Neville became the fourteenth Earl and that, of course, made me Lady Frampton.

         Whoopee, I thought, what an upgrade on Miss South East Counties! And, with another child on the way, I thought things were set to get even better. This time it would be fifth time lucky and when my stomach went a very different shape to how it had been before, I became convinced, as was everyone else that the child inside me was a boy. The only downer was that the, poor child, was to be named Hubert after Neville’s father but apart from that it was all systems go and Hubert was duly enrolled for his father’s schools up to and including Harrow. Unfortunately on the day of his triumphal entry into this world Hubert turned out to be a Huberta, and as part of her father’s revenge was christened as such in the family church in front of six people who reluctantly included Neville, looking even grimmer than at his father’s funeral.

         It was not long after that the thorny issue of divorce was raised. Not by me of course, I liked being Lady Frampton and no one was going to edit me out of Debretts. Needless to say Neville went into another one of his sulks and spent more and more time away at his club. How would I have managed without Mildred, my darling sister and confidant, who was not only my rock during these troubled times but somehow effected the reconciliation that brought Neville back to his senses. How she did this when I could hardly drag a word out of him I will never know but within a month our life together became as tranquil as a millpond, and although Neville seldom strayed from his side of the marital bed he was, at least, still in it. And that’s how it was until that dreadful evening when everything changed and I went shooting up through the ceiling.

 To Be Continued/... 

                                                                        Copyright Richard Banks 

Sunday, 26 May 2024

We Will Not Forget!

 We Will Not Forget!

By Sis Unsworth

They were indecisive, back then so long ago,

The weather unpredictable, they weren’t sure they would go.

The channel was so stormy, they were filled with gloom,

But a decision had to be made, and they had to make it soon.

The sailors and the soldiers, would face the stormy sea,

while the RAF would fly above, to help set Europe free.

At last they got the order, to face the angry tide,

those who were believers, prayed god was on their side.

They reached the Normandy beaches, early in the morning,

anxious that the enemy, had not had any warning.

Despite the bad conditions, they did their best to cope,

and by the end of that long day, Europe now had hope.

So remember eighty years ago, they fought without regret,

and the least that we can do for them, is never to forget!

 

Copyright Sis Unsworth